Opening of Britney Statue in NYC: April 7

Here are some, uh, alternate views of the infamous Britney sculpture. Excuse me while I vomit.

If you live in New York and want to see this...thing...for yourself, it is residing at the Capla Kesting Fine Art Gallery in Brooklyn from April 7-23. Admission is free. I think 'fine art' is a debatable term here.

Paris Hilton at Las Vegas Nightclub Pure: April 7

She gave an impromptu performance of two songs: one from her upcoming album entitled "Fighting Over Me," and a cover of Rod Stewart's "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?". I think the song choices are very indicative of Hilton's personality, don't you?

She looks like she's having an orgasm when she sings.

With sister Nicky.

Was anyone actually there?? I want to hear how she sounds live!


Something POSITIVE About Britney, Finally

Britney Spears surprised a group of local children when she showed up at the Malibu Academy of Dance to teach two jazz and hip-hop classes. People Magazine reports:
Spears showed up in dance-teacher mode – wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt – and instructed a packed house of 88 students, ranging in age from 7 to 14. She played a new remix of the Eurythmics song "Here Comes the Rain Again" – and one of her own tunes that's likely to be on her next album. Then she went into action, showing the students a series of dance moves. "(Britney) did a step called The Monkey, and she did a little squeak at the end of it," studio owner Steve Chase told us. "It had all the kids laughing. She was incredibly sweet with them, and called everyone 'baby.' " And Spears brought a very special guest: son Sean Preston, to whom the school gifted a basket of Lyla Blu t-shirts.

And it wasn't a one-shot deal: The next day, the pop diva returned solo and taught the same routine to another class. "Britney lives close by so I think she did it as a way of giving back to her community," says Chase, who added that she would definitely be back to help her young fans with some more fancy footwork."

Tom Gets Katie A Pacifier

According to Star Magazine, Tom Cruise recently visited his children's orthodontist to commission an adult-sized rubber "pacifier" for Katie Holmes to hold between her teeth while she is giving birth. The purpose of the pacifier is to muffle Katie's screams and let her bite it and take her aggressions out in a non-vocal manner. This birth just keeps getting weirder and weirder. Why not get her a chew toy?

It's Getting Nasty Already

From People Magazine:

"The Eminem-Kim Mathers split got nasty – and public – on Thursday when Kim called a Detroit-area radio station to tell her story, the Associated Press reports.

Eminem, 33, and Kim, 31, were married on Jan. 14 for the second time, and the rapper (real name: Marshall Bruce Mathers III) filed for divorce on April 5.

On the morning radio call-in, Kim said that trouble between the two had started even before the wedding.

"He's having problems with, you know, his problem that he had," she said, apparently referring to the sleeping-pill addiction for which Eminem sought treatment last summer.

"Right after he came home from his rehab, we started to have a few problems, and I thought it was going to be in our best interest to delay the wedding. But he really pushed it and I thought it was really going to be something that worked this time."

She hadn't spoken to Eminem in six weeks, Kim said, but she was still surprised to receive divorce papers this week. "I don't really necessarily want to get divorced. I was hoping he was going to come home and say, 'I got us a counselor, let's go.' "

Later that day, Eminem released a statement responding to Kim's comments.

"The details surrounding both my marriage and subsequent filing for divorce are private, and I had hoped to keep them that way for the sake of my family," it read.

"A few of Kim's statements in a radio interview need to be addressed," the statement continued. "First, her allegations regarding my status post-rehab are both untrue and unfortunate. Second, she was aware that I was filing for divorce.

"We both tried to give our marriage another chance and quickly realized that a wedding doesn't fix the underlying problems."

The couple, whose first marriage lasted from 1999 to 2001, have a daughter, Hailie Jade, 10, and adopted Kim's niece Alaina, 12. Kim also has a daughter, Whitney, 3, from a previous relationship."

They should just take it on Jerry Springer already and get it the hell over with.

Benchwarmers Premiere in LA

David Spade, Jon Heder, and Rob Schneider at the LA premiere of their movie, Benchwarmers, which opens nationally today.

I had the opportunity to meet Rob Schneider in Hawaii and he is a perfect gentleman. Sooooo nice! I got to hear him sing, too, and he's very good!

Ciara and Bow Wow Split

The couple announced their split yesterday after Bow Wow was spotted last week in LA with another woman. A representative for Ciara said that the couple had broken up some time ago and that "their parting was amicable." Bow Wow confirmed the split, telling Teen People magazine, "Ciara and I have parted ways...I wish her all the best."
Ciara was given a large diamond "friendship" ring by Bow Wow that she wore on her left ring finger, but the two were not engaged.


Readers, I Need Your Help

Since I know there are people out there besides myself that reads this, I want to know what the hell is going on in the following picture. Is Britney smoking a cigarette while holding Sean's bottle or is she just holding the bottle like a cigarette? Is that even possible? Wouldn't the weight of the actual bottle pull the nipple off? Why am I obsessing over this? Please help!

Eric Roberts at the Premiere of Phat Girlz in LA

Katie is Ready to POP

Here she is at Neiman Marcus. I'm surprised Tom allowed a shopping trip, I give Katie props, though, because doctors advise pregnant women to try to stay active for as long as possible before going into labor. I would have thought Tom would have her tied to the bed by now.

Jessica Simpson at Whole Foods

Is she a space cadet, or what? CaCee is doing all the talking for her...she probably did the shopping too. I wonder why Jess even bothered to go. And - ARGH - huge pet peeve - she's wearing her sunglasses INDOORS. Why!?!? Someone explain the logic behind this to me.


Here's a picture of the ring on Kenzie Dalton's engagement finger. She's rumored to be engaged to One Tree Hill costar Chad Michael Murray. Like she soooo did not stage these photos for the paparazzi. And like it's soooooo not a shotgun wedding. Yeehaw.


Lance Keeps Trading Up

EWWW, look at Lance Armstrong with his skanky new girlfriend! It's obvious as to why he's dating her. I can't stand it when people say, "Oh, he's so courageous, he beat cancer, blah blah blah." I'm sure cancer was very difficult for him, but if I recall, it was his first wife who helped him care for it and saw him at his weakest puking over the toilet from chemo. And what does he do? HE CHEATS ON HER. With Sheryl Crow. For Christ's sake, he has kids! And now he's dumped Cheryl (before she was diagnosed with cancer herself) for this blonde bimbo. Livestrong, my ass.

Some Celebrities Walking Around

Lindsay Lohan leaving the same tanning/massage parlor that Paris did a few days ago. Like the porkpie hat.

Liz Hurley and son Damien returning from his birthday party. Look at her shoes! How can she be in casual-mommy-mode all day with those on?

Hillary Swank will always look like a male to me. I thought it before I saw Boys Don't Cry! I swear! I thought it when she was on 90210! I was always like, "Brandon, don't choose that little butch bitch, pick Kelly..." I digress.

Soon She'll Rule the World

It was announced this morning that after 15 years at NBC as the coanchor of the
show, Katie Couric will join the CBS evening news team. She will replace Bob Schieffer as the anchor of "cbs evening news", thus becoming the first female solo news anchor. Her salary is rumored to be around $17 million dollars per year. Meredith Viera, of ABC's The View and Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is rumored to be the frontrunner for Katie's replacement. Katie commented:“I wanted to tell all of you out there who have watched the show for the past 15 years that after listening to my heart and my gut — two things that have served me pretty well in the past — I’ve decided I’ll be leaving Today at the end of May. I really feel as if we’ve become friends through the years.”

Look Out For a New Hit Song

Rapper Eminem (aka Marshall Mathers and Slim Shady) has announced that he and his wife Kim - yes, the same Kim he wanted to hack up to pieces in his song of the same title - are getting another divorce after being remarried for less than three months. The motion for divorce states that Eminem and Kim have a prenuptial agreement but it is not specific and only states that "the property of the parties should be divided in accordance with" the agreement. Eminem is currently seeking joint custody of daughter Haillie Jade, but contrary to popular belief, Kim is not pregnant. She is, however, a gold digger and an idiot for opting to remarry a man that has a tattoo of her emblazoned on her skin that reads 'Kim: Rot In Pieces'. That'd be a hint to me that it wasn't gonna last.

Did Anyone Think They Weren't?

In addition to the releae of scandalous photos (see below) revealing the extent of Whitney Houston's cocaine use, information is now being revealed that Houston and long-time husband Bobby Brown are a part a drug-promoting cult called the "Black Hebrews". The couple first encounted the troop on their infamous trip to Israel, where Houston met with the cult leader, Ben Ammi Ben Israel. (just for the record, his hometown is Chicago and his real name Ben Carter. I bet he misses Pizzeria UNO.) The cult has a suspicious past; in 1980, one of Carter's followers was convicted of running an international crime ring and the entire cult was linked to the death a child because of the diet the cult forced the child to be on. Hey, maybe it's the same diet that Whitney's on! Does that mean he just fed the kid crack?


I LOVE These!

Does anyone remember reading the Mr. & Miss books as a little kid? Or has anyone bought these books for their children? I loved them when I was little - they have titles like Mr. Mess, Little Miss Bossy, and Mr. Loud. They all had a lesson based on the bad trait of the title character. Anyway, they turned 30 this year and here are Mr. & Miss Birthday with their creator, Adam Hargreaves, in London. My favorite was Little Miss Neat, because that's how I am in real life. Too tidy. Sorry this wasn't gossip, it's just a bit of me reminiscing! Even if you're not a kid or don't have any, go out and buy one of these books or at least read one in the store!

Hedwig & the Angry Inch VIP Show at the Roxy

Taryn Manning looking really lovely and pulled-together for once

The lazy eye's acting up again.

YEAHHHH! You rock on like the has-been rock star you are!

Nicky Hilton should marry Owen Wilson and see how messed up they can get their kids' noses to be just through genetics.

Milla Jovovich...is she pregnant? I must have missed that news, but maybe it's just her outfit.

Danny Masterson, paramour of Bijou Philips

Shiva Rose and Dylan McDermott. I find them strangely out of place here, but whatever.

Bijou in all her cross-dressing glory

YEAHHHH! Rock on, Juliette Lewis, go rock on with Mark McGrath.

Another Supermodel Makes Ugly Jewelry

Doesn't Esther Canadas look a lot like Michelle Pfeiffer here? And why, if it's the launch of her new jewelry line, does it say Rebecca in the background?

Their Kind of Town?

From WENN:

Jennifer Aniston's dreams of leaving Hollywood are being realized after
the former Friends star and her boyfriend Vince Vaughn were spotted checking out luxury apartments in Chicago, Illinois over the weekend (02-03APR06).
The actress has been vocal about her growing hatred for life in paparazzi-crazed Tinseltown in recent interviews and now it seems she's keen to put down roots in funnyman Vaughn's home state - where the couple fell in love on the set of The Break-Up.
According to an eyewitness, who spotted the couple househunting and relaxing, Aniston and Vaughn looked "down to earth and very much in love."
The couple toured the Red Door Spa in downtown Chicago. Word is that they were checking out the spa because they have their eye on a property in the luxury highrise tower above it.
Aniston and Vaughn have been practically inseparable since they started dating last year (05). (JS+KL/WN/NYP)

Jennifer Aniston's dreams of leaving Hollywood are being realized after
the former Friends star and her boyfriend Vince Vaughn were spotted checking out luxury apartments
Chicago, Illinois - 03.04.06

Hmm... I'll keep you posted! I love Vaughniston.

What a Cute Couple

From The Mirror:

“One night 10 of us were in a limo all completely wasted and my head was spinning. I told the driver I was going to throw up, but he didn’t stop fast enough, so I just jumped out while we were still going about 20 miles an hour.

“I rolled on to the curb and Carey jumped out after me. I was freaking out, desperate to make myself throw up and Carey was like, ‘Baby do you want me to hold your hair?’ And I was like, ‘Get away from me.’ I was, like, totally embarrassed.

“Suddenly he said, ‘Do you want me to throw up with you?’ and I was like, ‘Er, OK.’ So he sticks his whole hand down his throat and throws up with me. I was like, that’s the most romantic thing anyone’s ever done for me.”
Um, ok.

John Stamos to Join ER

John Stamos (of Full House and Rebecca Romjin fame) is set to join the cast of the NBC medical drama ER for its 13th season in the fall. He will be reprising his guest starring role from this season as Tony Gates, paramedic/medical sudent. This casting fuels the rumors that Stamos' current project, ABC's Jake in Progress is officially cancelled after it was pulled from the air abruptly after one episode this season. To join NBC, Stamos would have to no longer be contractually tied to ABC, and it looks as if that is the case.

Looks Like She Got What She Wanted

Laguna Beach alum and notorious fame-seeker (Nick Lachey, anyone?) Kristin Cavallari finally got her wish: a costarring role in a legit motion picture. She will co-star with American Dreams' Brittany Snow in a psychological thriller entitled Fingerprints, which is to be based on an urban legend centered around haunted Kristin Cavallari train tracks. Snow plays a girl fresh out of rehab (although what kind of rehab has not been mentioned yet - it could be physical Brittany Snow rehab, I'm thinking, from the rest of the plot details) who moves back home with her parents and sister (Cavallari). Snow becomes i involved in an investigation as to what is paralyzing patients at the rehab center. Damn, it doesn't sound like Kristen has a great chance of getting killed off early in this film.