Thank You For Smoking Premiere - Los Angeles, March 15

Moulin Rouge director Baz Lurhman

Tara Lipinski - how random.

Cameron Bright, that scary kid from Birth. He plays Aaron Eckhart's son in this movie.

Rachel Bilson, looking absolutely gorgeous...

...and her equally-as-gorgeous boyfriend, Adam Brody, and Rob Lowe.

The cutest couple ever, Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy

Kristin Cavalleri...I have to admit she looks really pretty here. It's still creepy that she's dating Nick Lachey, though.

Emaciated Celebrities

How can Nicole Richie carry that humongous bag andher dog? Her arms don't look like they could carry anything.

Kate Bosworth looks absolutely terrible. When did she get so skinny?

Edit: It has come to my attention that this picture has been Photoshopped. Before I apologize for posting it, let me just say, thank GOD.

Mary Kate still looks like she's struggling with anorexia. She also looks like she should be in that movie about baby prostitutes, Pretty Baby.


This Makes Me Kind of Sad

Michael Jackson has officially shut down Neverland Ranch, after controversy over payment due to employees. He eventually agreeed to pay them an alleged $306,000 in owed wages. If he didn't give them their money, he faced a lawsuit from the California Department of Industrial Relations. His spokeswoman, Raymone K. Bain, recently assured the press that Neverland was not permanently closed, saying, "Reports that Neverland have been closed or shut down for good are inaccurate...There will be no further comments regarding this matter."However, electricity had been turned off on most of the ranch, as well as the gas, resulting in no heat or hot water. What's more, Jackson no longer carries any type of commercial insurance for Neverland. He currently lives in the Middle Eastern country of Bahrain with his children, a driver, a Bentley GT, and a Rolls Royce Phantom, all of which (except the kids, duh) have been supplied by Crown Prince Abdullah.

Employees were called to the ranch on Thursday in several groups and given their back pay after being informed that the ranch had been shut down by the California Department of Labor. The state finally closed the ranch after finding that Jackson carried no worker's compensation and his staff's health insurance had run out February 28th. What really makes me sad, though is the fact that the zoo animals are now seeking a new home. Neverland was visited recently by representatives from Marine World that are considering adopting many of the animals.

Despite the lavish lifestyle Jackson lives in Bahrain, he faces several American lawsuits as well as the foreclosure of $270 million worth of loans. He also now must pay the state of California two seperate fines, one for $69,000 and one for over $100k that will be determined today.

Even though Jackson's a sicko and is largely a comical figure now, I can't help but feel sad - maybe not exactly sorry, though - for him. I loved him so much growing up. The direction his life has taken is just strange.

Britney Spears Shopping in Los Angeles

I love how Brit's cousin (holding Sean Preston) is looking at her like, "Why am I carrying your kid?"

If she isn't pregnant, then there's something seriously wrong with her stomach. Us Weekly now claims a source says that the scar from Britney's c-section is infected and swollen, causing her entire belly to swell. I don't think so. I'm not a doctor, but I've had a scar get infected, but that doesnt mean my entire hand swelled up. Seems very fishy to me. She should just stop beating around the bush and admit that she's pregnant.


They're Finally Holding Hands!

After months of being super-secretive about their romance, Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn finally took it public at the HBO Comedy Arts Festival in Aspen, Colorado. They stayed in the $3,000 a night presidential suite at the St. Regis, had sushi with Aniston's Friends costar Lisa Kudrow, and drank vodka martinis with Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle before leaving on March 12. They're too cute. Brad may be the hotter of the two, but personally, I like Vince better.

Christina Aguilera's Nipple Ring

Is this new?

What's Wrong With Avril?

Paparazzi snapped this photo of pop singer Avril Lavigne and fiancee Dereck Whibley, lead singer of Sum 41 at a mall in Brentwood, California. Lavigne is visibly upset while Whibley seems to be comforting her. Eyewitness sources also report there was a clear bump in her belly and hint that it's more than just a full tummy. Lavigne has put her Toronto home on the market for $600,000 and is in the process of moving to Los Angeles to live with Whibley.

EA/Paramount Launch of "The Godfather: The Game" - Los Angeles, March 15

Snoop Dogg and Ice Cube.

Do they just go to every event possible so they can get the free booze? And, more importantly, which is uglier: Paris' fur or Nicky's coat?

Ew. Oma-gross-a should not be wearing a midriff shirt. Nor should she continue to be milking her fifteen minutes. I hate how she always poses like that, yet she is the world's biggest bitch.

Yay, it's Tori Spelling, another B-list celeb!

I'm glad Shannon Elizabeth decided to dress up for the occasion.

Basic Instinct 2 Premiere - London, March 14

Sharon Stone may be crazy and the movie is a guaranteed bomb, but she's still gorgeous.

Mont Blanc 100th Anniversary Party in NYC - March 13

Jane, I saw you in Wedding Crashers. All of you. You should not be dressing like the Queen Mum.

Truly one of the ugliest dresses I have ever seen.

Of course Ashanti was there, she'll do anything bling-related. She gave her mother a diamond necklace that reads 'Momager'.

What is with Aisha Tyler's hair? She looks like Alfalfa.

Samaire Armstrong or Richie Rich of Heatherette? You decide.

Mandy's accessories are eating her alive. She doesn't look too pleased about it.


Only the Best for Kate

Recent shoppers at New York's La Petite Coquette witnessed Kate Moss purchasing a 24k gold vibrator, called the Jimmyjane "Little Something". It comes available with various inscriptions, such as "Sugar", "Be Mine", "Sweetie", or "Flirt". No word on which one the supermodel chose. The toy is also available in Platinum and Steel and can be purchased online at Jimmyjane.com. The basic gold version retails for $275, while the limited edition goes for $350.

Donald Trump is a Pedophile

This story is a week old, but I still find it creepy enough to post. On a March 6 episode of "The View", guest star, real-estate mogul, and host of "The Apprentice", Donald Trump joked that he would date his 24-year old daughter, Ivanka, if he weren't her father.

When asked how he would feel if she posed for Playboy, Trump replied, "It would be really disappointing - not really - but it would depend on
what's inside the magazine...I don't think Ivanka would do that, although
she does have a very nice figure. I've said if Ivanka weren't my daughter, perhaps I'd be dating her."

Ummm...creepy. I think that was a joke that definitely misfired. It's more creepy when you realize he has a 35 year old pregnant wife. Bleh.

Natalie Portman Succumbs to the Disease

...of posing naked on a magazine cover. Entertainment Tonight reported on March 13 that the V for Vendetta actress (looks like a kickass movie, by the way) will pose nude, or nearly nude, for an upcoming issue of Vanity Fair, replacing a planned coved of ex-couple Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow. Portman recently posed for a page in the March issue, but was fully clothed. She'll follow in the footsteps of Keira Knightley, Scarlett Johansson, Teri Hatcher, Lindsay Lohan, Angelina Jolie, Joy Bryant, and Jennifer Aniston, all of whom have recently posed semi-clothed or completely nude for the magazine. I'm not a feminazi or anything, but it seems like every single actress in Hollywood is shedding their clothes for VF these days. It's like the new Playboy, except it's still considered 'arty' because Annie Leibowitz shoots the stills and Dominick Dunne contributes articles from time to time. Also, notice how Tom Ford is fully clothed on the March cover? Why can't he show some skin? (Not that I'm attracted to him, I'm just trying to make a point.) I'm sure Portman's photos will be tasteful, but I'm just a little disappointed. Rachel McAdams has some integrity; she signed off on the Ford-Johansson-Knightley shoot at the last minute. That girl is gorgeous.

Speaking of Vanity Fair, rumors are circulating that Britney Spears - assuming she's with child again - wants to do a nude cover in the spirit of Demi Moore's from the early 90's. Please, God, no. No to the pregnancy and no to the cover. The public doesn't need either.

New Brit Pic

Two new pics of Brit-Brit, shopping in Maui, to add fuel to the rumor that another Federline baby is on the way. Is that just a tummy or is it an honest-to-goodness bump? She definitely looks preggers to me. One thing's for sure, she has no fashion sense. Love the white-trash ribbed flip flops. Hope the white-trash car in the background is not hers.

The lovely couple on their hotel room balcony...K-Fed seems to be impersonating ET while Britney seems to be real trailer trash.

Tara Reid in Car Accident

...drunk, of course, after leaving Dennis Rodman's house in Newport Beach last Wednesday night. She crashed into a neighbor's car and attempted to pay the poor person off instead of exchanging insurance information by offering him or her a measly $700 dollars. According to a source, Reid's pupils were dilated. She looks like crap, as always, in these recent pictures. What the hell is she wearing? She looks like she belongs in a bordello, jewelry and all. And with all her money, can't she find a blazer that fits properly? Or are her implants simply too out-of-proportion? To me, it looks more like tummy flab...aka a beer belly. Gross.
Girl just looks unhealthy.

Beyonce Looks Amazing

Although, personally, I never think the girl takes a bad photograph, she looks great in these recent photos. She's really slimmed down, apparently for her upcoming role in Dreamgirls. Notice Mama Knowles keeping watch in the background?

Kimberly Stewart Missed Her Friends

After getting her implants removed and presenting them to ex-boyfriend Jack Osbourne as a birthday present, it seems obvious that Kim changed her mind and headed back to the plastic surgeon's office. Then she went shopping and bought the ugliest dress she could find. Her hair and makeup look good, though. Much improved from the fringe she used to have in her face.


When a Man Loves a Man...

It's official. They're engaged. If he hadn't cut his luscious locks a few years back I would be confused over who the bride was. Actually, they both look male to me, so it would be a transvestite confusion, I suppose. I wonder if he'll sing his early 90's classic "Let Me Touch You There" at the reception?